Food isn’t ruining your life, but how you eat it, is.

• Imagine if you could finish a small bowl of pasta and NOT feel the yearn or urge to go back for more (and more, and More, and MORE).

• Imagine if you felt zero desire to polish off your kids’ supper, and instead scraped their chewed up leftovers straight into the bin like a proper grown up.

• Imagine what it would be like if your first thought of the day wasn’t, “how did I eat yesterday, was I good or was I bad”, and your mood wasn’t set for the day depending on the answer?

This new reality is waiting for you (and it’s wearing a halter top).

You can be free of this bizarre food obsession that’s plagued you and your waistline since your teens.  You can be the one who eats well or not at all.  You can be the gal who eats when she’s hungry and stops when she’s full, and never, I repeat never, mindlessly goes to the fridge to pick at last night’s leftovers.

Yo-Yo Dieter to Go-Go Getter delivers the weight loss us serial dieters have been dreaming about since we had braces on our teeth. It will show YOU (yes, even you over there with all the extra meat on the bone), how to get your sh*t together.  Wouldn’t it be something to get rid of that horrible feeling of tension that creeps into your chest when faced with a plate of cupcakes, or tube of pringles or mashed up bit of sausage only a crazy person would surely consider tempting?

Stumbling through life obsessed with food is awful.  I’d know, I did it for long enough.  One minute you’re on the wagon and eating virtually nothing, the next day you’re off it so it “doesn’t matter” that you’ve fallen headlong into a very large pizza with garlic dips on the side.  Hey, when you start your diet again on Monday you can lose, like, half a stone in a week, so what’s a pizza the size of a roundabout between friends?

Trouble is, we can’t stay on the healthy eating wagon long enough to make any meaningful inroads into our extra weight, so every pizza slip up like this one just adds to the (now considerably fleshy) pile.

And of course we feel like failures – after all it only takes a doughnut to set our pulses racing.  And let’s not forget ridiculous, because we’re talking bread here, not crystal meth, yet toasties are ruling your life (and wrecking your body) in nearly the same way.

We assume the problem lies with us.  We must be greedy or we’ve got issues stemming back to our childhood or we’re straight up, flat out addicted to sugar (meaning of course bread because that’s the one that gets us every time.  I mean a warm baguette, a pat of butter and a block of cheddar – it’s dreamy, right?)

So basically our choice in sorting this is to fix some kind of character defect, seek therapy or overcome an addiction, which everybody knows means abstaining entirely from sugar (which is impossible as a human on planet Earth) and being “in recovery” until the day we die.

Naturally we assume we’re fucked, then, and destined to be like this forever – porky and judged as greedy for it.

But here’s the thing, you’re not fucked.  There’s nothing wrong with you at all.  There’s nothing that needs fixing, or changing or mending or talking through.  You don’t even need to quit sugar (if you don’t want to).  You’ve been labouring under a misapprehension, that’s all, and once I correct that misapprehension, flip it on its head, all of your issues will go away.

No more guilt because you slipped up and had a chocolate muffin, no more tiptoeing to the fridge to have a bit off the cheese when no one’s looking.  No more rummaging through your memory files trying to find a reason why you’re like this.  No more big bottom (yippeee!).

Yo-Yo to Go-Go will completely revolutionise the way you see food, eat food and think about food, forever.  So if you want to see a loaf of bread as nothing more than a lump of baked atoms, as opposed to a hypnotic life force that you are powerless to resist then book the call.  My promise to you is I won’t let you go until you’re indifferent to bread / cake / pork scratchings / name your poison.  And it will be fun.

No fluff, fanfare or faffing about, just the dollop of missing info you need to put your food issues to bed once and for all (hint: it’s not a new of doing that you need, it’s a new way of seeing that will cure you).

This isn’t about losing weight, it’s about gaining freedom (though being able to rock a pair of skinny jeans is a nice bonus), so book the call now – you’ve nothing to lose except those bingo wings.